Everyday I face an uncomfortable frustration. I feel irritated to the max for no reason. I lack the motivation to even get out of bed. I struggle to find the joy in anything. I just want to crawl into a dark cave and hibernate. I know what the problem is. I know what I was diagnosed with so many years ago. I know how they say to overcome it. I know what I have to do. As hard as I try or as many times as I pull up my straps, I a m constantly weighed down. I turn upwards in prayer. I turn downwards in silence. I wait. And wait. And wait. But nothing happens. Nothing changes. Nothing works. I stop fighting. I stop trying. I stop thinking. I just stop. I was born this way and I will die this way. Strong enough to fight tomorrow. Too weak to move today. Already forgot about yesterday.